another back-dated entry...
written at 7:00 p.m. on 05.05.04
Well, I did what I hoped not to do.. I cried watching the season finale of the O.C. My makeup washed away as did every last drop of sanity and pride. My goodness. Feel free to laugh long and hard about that one. Laugh some more. One last laugh, and.. you're done. End of story.
I question my sanity a lot when I cry, come to think of it. I generally cry at really random things. I think part of the deal is that, well, obviously I can be really emotional from time to time. In actuality, I'm probably really emotional all the time, but I just keep myself in line while in public and usually in private, too. Anywho, I've come to the conclusion that I just hold back the emotions concerning my life and let 'em loose watching someone else's life. That makes sense in my head, and hopefully it makes sense to someone else, too. I'm still in the middle of questioning my sanity, so it'd be nice to be reassured one way or the other as to whether I'm sane or not.
One thing's for sure. I need all the sanity I can muster and then some, as I prepare to take the dreaded AP English exam. I can only imagine what horrors lay in wait. Honestly, I want to just go to bed early and be well-rested, but.. I have late work to do and such fun nonsense. Yar! Why can't I just pull myself together and deal with four stressful days like a mature young adult?! No, instead, Cookie crumbles the way all good cookies do. Bah. I despise the crumbliness of myself. In fact, I might just cry about it. Ok, not really, but you get the point.
Oh, crap! Tomorrow night is the choir concert, too. That means I can't just go home and crash for the weekend. I really wish someone would pinch me and wake me up from this nightmare. My stress tolerance level seems to be getting lower and lower, and pretty soon I'll be one of those annoying stereotypical valley girls who hyperventilates every time my nail breaks. "Like, oh my gosh, like, I, like, totally broke, like, a nail! Like, oh my gosh!"
I found out the origin of the term "valley girl" today while reading my newest Marian Keyes book, Angels. I'd explain, but I really am too tired and this entry is sapping me of precious energy. My precioussss.
That's what I need as a pick-me-up. Lord of the Rings. I'd cry through the whole thing, though. Of course, I'd end up doing the whole crying thing up until I got to a funny part, and then I'd pull a laugh-while-crying stunt, thereby inhaling several gallons of tears. I'd start choking, and then I'd cry at how pathetic I was. Of course, I'd snap out of it shortly thereafter and realize how blessed I am to be alive to witness the work of one genius, J.R.R. Tolken, and another genius, Peter Jackson, and one sexy little hobbit, Elijah Wood, culminate to create the best life has to offer. Gah!! Now, I'm all psyched to watch some movies. I say, now is as good a time as any to fail some classes for the sake of good entertainment.
Now I'm back to entertainment. What an odd little loop that was. O.C. to Lord of the Rings. Good gravy, the mind is an odd little contraption, isn't it? But it's a lovable little bugger, nonetheless. Now I'm morphing into pure craziness. Pardon me while I go study for the most ridiculously difficult test ever conceived. Ok, slight exaggeration. But pardon me. I really am leaving, and I really am studying. Alright, fine, I really am leaving, but your guess is as good as mine what I"ll end up doing. In any case.. the end.
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