die, barney, die!
written at 3:35 p.m. on 10.05.03
You know, I enjoy reading the older entries of my own diary. I had some good times. I make myself laugh. I said "by Jove" once. That was grand. Reading my newer entries.. as in from the past year.. I feel sad that I am no longer random or amusing. If I can't make myself laugh.. well, that's pretty sad, cuz I'm about the most easily amused person in the world. Well, no, I take that back. Patrick probably is."You, hey you, get out of our way because today is the day that we put you away!" Cheerleading will always haunt me. Hilarity, where are you? I'm playing hide and go seek. You're not very good at this game, are you? No, I always sucked at hide and seek. I was good at hiding, but that's about it. I was pretty bad at tag, too. Come to think of it, I never was good at anything that involved competition. That's a sure road to success, kid. I think you'll make a great CEO. Thanks, Hilarity. I feel better already. Anytime, kid. You know just where to find me... anywhere but this diary. Yeah, yeah. Don't remind me. So, Crime and Punishment is a freakin long book. In fact, it should be a CRIME to write such a long book. It's certainly a PUNISHMENT to read it! Hahahahahaha. Puns are so reliably not funny. It's great. Hahaha. Hilarity, you're back! Oh darn. You found me! Captain Kyle, did you call the other day? My mom said something about that this morning, but I didn't quite understand what she was saying. That's the way the cookie crumbles. And I would know, being a cookie and all. That makes me miss Kyle. I had to explain to Matt Seiwart why I am called "cookie," and after I finished my explanation, I said, "Yeah, Kyle used to say stuff like 'Shh. Cookies don't talk.'" Matt now says that sometimes. It's sad. "Money matters like cake" That's the title of an article in the "Home" section of the newspaper from July 3. Why do I have an old newspaper lying about? Well, my dear friend, I collect the house blue-prints from the newspapers to use on the Sims. It's bunches of fun. I'm getting nerdier by the minute. Can you stand it? Or will you explode with nauseau? I hope you'll follow the latter path, cuz I could use the entertainment. If you don't mind, that is. La di da. I love you, you love me, we're a happy family. Half the kids that watch that show don't have happy families. That's why everyone wants to slap Barney. Well, that and because he's just freakin annoying. Dinosaurs are supposed to be vicious and frightening, not cuddly and cutesy-wootsy. I mean, come on. The show would be ten times better if Barney ate the kids at the end of the show. Or maybe, if Barney would tip over once in a while, I wouldn't hate him so much. (He has to tip over some times. He can't be that coordinated. He's huge and he dances. Those are the perfect ingredients for disaster.) Fall, Barney! Die, children! No more dancing and singing and merriment. BAH! Well, I feel like Hilarity has once again escaped my grasp. But I had chocolate chip pancakes this morning, so I don't care. Hmph. Na na na boo boo, stick your head in vile things. The end. ::cookie::
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